post-formal recruitment blues

So I went through formal recruitment in Jan/Feb and it was kinda rough for me. I was dropped by a lot of my top houses by the second round, and was holding out for one to invite me back to Pref, but was dropped. I was so devastated that I dropped recruitment altogether.

I thought the feelings of worthlessness/not being good enough would fade by now but they're still there. I see my friends busy and happy with their rush processes in sororities I would've loved to be in. I can't help but think there's something wrong with me.

I know this seems pathetic but I thought I did so well during recruitment (gpa/conversations/outfits/activities) and I don't know where I went wrong. I want to do informal but I don't know if the chapters I'm interested in will be doing that. Plus if I do spring I don't want to seem desperate or undesirable because I'll be a sophomore rushing for the second time :/

Any advice would be appreciated, thank you.