Frats If they were items

sigma - bag of hair for orphans with cancer
Delt - roadkill
sae - the crack pipe found outside of UDF
dke - protein powder laced with fentanyl
apes - pedestrian crossing sign
pi kapp - the one sock you’ll never wear because it’s been “used” too many times
ato - a penny you found on the ground in the tuna bathroom
beta - Nancy Pelosi’s tax returns
kdr - Forrest Gump’s ping pong paddle
theta chi - a book on alchemy