scared to death

I'm not really sure why you posted this on here. You didn't ask a question or anything.

You will end up where you're supposed to, your legacy chapter or not. Make your decision based on where YOU feel most at home. That is way more important than what your mom wants you to be. Remember, you are the one that will be spending all your time here for the next 4 years, not her!

And on them dropping you, you never know. It could happen, or it may not. Just don't stress about it because like I already said, IT WILL ALL WORK OUT.

Moms should NEVER put this type of pressure on their daughters.

What if your legacy chapter keeps you, but as you get closer to the end of the week you fall in love elsewhere and want to join that chapter?

Make the decision that is best for you. Let you mom know that you are thrilled that she found a sorority that she loves dearly, and that you want the same opportunity. If that happens to be the legacy chapter then great. I've seen legacies who felt pressure to join their mom's group wind up miserable because they really wanted to be in a different sorority.

Follow YOUR heart. You are 18. This isn't about you living out your mom's dream but instead about you making your own dreams.

(and if you do get released, consider it a gift from that sorority that you will be able to freely choose the chapter that is best for you, without having to deal with this ridiculous mommy pressure. Let mom know that you are OK, excited about the remaining parties on your schedule, and have no doubt that one of those sororities will become as special to you as hers is to her. Invite her to share your excitement.)

To the moms reading this, since apparently you are out there: some chapters have over 400 legacies participating in Recruitment. Logistically many have to be released, because obviously that number is much, much larger than the pledge class will be. This is an emotional week for your daughter. Why make it worse?

I was an AXO at another school, and my daughter went through rush last year at Alabama. She really wanted AXO, and ONE of the reasons was that she wanted to share those traditions with me. (That wasn't the only reason by any means. She knew several girls in there, and loved them.) When you grow up in a family where sorority is important and a part of your life, it's hard not to impart that to your daughters or for them to see that. It's not like we think about their rush when they are 5 years old! (ok maybe some moms do...but I sure didn't!) I told my girl she had to find her own place in her own sorority, and to keep an open mind. Sororities are different at every school, and even different years. She got cut after Philanthropy round, and was devastated. She almost quit rush, but hung in there and found a 'lower tier" house (whatever that means!) that fits her personality much better and I'm so happy for her.
Moral of the story...follow your heart PNM's. Your heart might be telling you to go your mom's sorority, or maybe not. It's your time now. Your mom loves you and will be happy for you wherever you end up!
Getting cut early let's you focus on the other houses that DO think you'll be a good fit. It's hard to "rally" after you've been cut by a house you wanted, but it's truly a blessing in disguise.
Even if you don't feel you "fit in" and you aren't 100% sold on Bid Day...give the girls a chance. Go to the pledge retreat and get to know some of your pledge sisters!

As a 'non alum mum' of sorority daughter i cannot begin to tell you how golden those words are, 'trust the process.' I was useless to my daughter when she went through rush a couple of years ago, but one thing i heard many times on here was 'trust the process...you will end up in house you belong.' So that is what I told her..she too had focused on certain houses not knowing other houses. In the end, she ended up where she belonged and she was not disappointed. What I realized was there is a process, a very fine tuned process and it works. It may not make sense to PNM's who are stressed, hot and tired but it does work. One thing I will point out that I've noticed on here--its gotten a little 'mean girl' --which is sad because it does not reflect sorority life at UA and is a disservice to them. So in a nutshell this is what i would tell PNM's, follow your heart/gut, not the popularity/critique of sorority videos, or the sorority rankings on Greekrank, nor negative comments about certain sororities over others on here. I know I don't understand some of the history many talk about on here, all I can tell you is that my daughter loves her sorority, loves her friends in other sororities and loves this school. Good luck to all!

Great words of wisdom forPNM's