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Thank you Washington and Lee!

by: Steve Nash is the hottest

Thank you people of W&L, for making me feel like a worthless human being just for having joined a "lower tier" fraternity.

It's crazy that no matter how I acted a majority of campus would automatically view me through a biased lens based off of my fraternity. I could be seen as "nice", "sweet" and "chill" by people but at the end of the day I was always a bottom-tier weirdo wasn't I?

I remember this one time when I was having a great conversation with a girl on Windfall (a Kappa or maybe a Theta? I don't remember), eventually she asked what fraternity I was in and when I told her, she immediately walked away.

The toxic social stratification of this school almost makes me regret joining my greek organization, regret having made all the friends and memories I did through it all. Because apparently being "socially relevant" is required for some people to even give you the time of day at W&L.

I took leadership positions in my frat and put in so much effort into making us a strong organization so we wouldn't be slandered so much by the rest of campus. But I don't think it was ever going to matter. I had good friends in a bunch of different fraternities and I like to think they actually like me, but who knows if the Greek tier bias affected how they perceive me as well.

And it's all because of a label I acquired second semester of freshman year. I didn't have an easy time first semester and ended up just pledging where I felt like I had met the most people/friends. Apparently I did it all wrong. I'm at least glad that I got involved on campus and made an effort to meet a bunch of different kinds of people, so I didn't just sit depressed within the walls of my fraternity for 4 years.

I love this school, don't get me wrong. And I probably have some bigger deep-seated self-esteem issues at play here. I just wish some things could've been different.

Sincerely,

A depressed alum


Posted By: Steve Nash is the hottest
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Page 1 of 1
#1  by: Sorry   
#1    

Unfortunately people assign stereotypes to all groups including “top tier” frats/ srats and evening those who try not to label themselves using Greek life. I’m so sorry this happened to you. However, at least you know that those people weren’t worth your time. If they only want to talk to you if you have a certain status are they worth talking to???

By: Sorry
by: OPApr 7, 2020 9:35:07 PM

Probably not. Sorry, I'm not trying to have a pity party for myself, it just sucks to know I had a hand in making my experience at W&L arguably worse than a lot of other people's. I guess it's true that you don't realize how much greek affiliation affects your social life/circle until it's too late.

By: OP
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by: SorryApr 8, 2020 1:50:31 AM

Don’t be sorry your feelings are completely valid. Don’t regret choosing a group of people who made you happy on the basis of how people treated you for being friends with them. That doesn’t do them justice. Instead of focusing on the people who didn’t vibe with you or weren’t nice, use this as an opportunity to reflect on your genuine friends and make sure you work hard to keep those bonds intact!

By: Sorry
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#2  by: Schuloch   
#2    

Man we really be living in a society

By: Schuloch
by: Phat debbyApr 9, 2020 9:51:29 PM

can you take your edgy E-girl thirst-seeking comment elsewhere? dumb

By: Phat debby
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#3  by: Pickled Richard   
#3    

Dude I completely understand. There was a guy I knew back in college who was in a similar situation. So there is this Bio major, basically a scientist right? And the dudes a genius. I’m talking different dimension destroying genius aight. But this guy, one night at windfall. THIS GUY, decides “eh, screw it I’m bored” and he turns himself into the most outrageous thing! I’m not talking a Kappa Sig, a SAE (RIP), or anyone else. This genius dude turns himself into a pickle! A FRICKIN PICKLE. Funniest THING I’ve ever seen.

By: Pickled Richard
#4  by: Uhh   
#4    

Can you name the frat? Just so I know to maybe not rush there

By: Uhh
by: OPApr 9, 2020 9:47:52 PM

I'm not going to name my frat for the sake of anonymity, but there are multiple frats where you might come out feeling dissatisfied like this at the end...honestly to get the best possible W&L social experience you basically have to join Kappa Sig (lax players, some wrestlers and other related athletes/narps) or Chi Psi (high-end southerners). They are the most selective, have the best parties/houses, get the most girls and dominate the social scene. However if you don't already know people from hometown/high school or are not on a sports team it can be difficult to get a bid to one of these houses. Plus, I'm just naming these two frats objectively if all you care about is being in the top house. If you do not fit into their niche (which not everyone does of course) then you might end up pretty unhappy. I know that while I wish I had not joined a bottom-tier fraternity, I definitely would not have fit in well at either of these places.

If you would like a quick low-down of all the fraternities on campus then just reply to my comment and I'd be happy to help you out.

Honestly I think if you join where you like a lot of the guys and see yourself having strong bonds with your pledge brothers, you will be very happy regardless of the "tier". Sure there's things like parties and girls to draw you in, but to be honest most girls at W&L are not even close to as attractive as those as state schools (you might hear the phrase "W&L goggles" thrown around a bit). My fraternity actually had a reputation for throwing some really good parties because we actually put a lot of thought and effort into them, some top-tier fraternities will put almost zero effort into their parties because they just assume a lot of people will show up regardless, so it doesn't matter.

Again let me know if you have any other questions about W&L, social life, etc. Best of luck

By: OP
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#5  by: Dude   
#5    

Snu...

By: Dude
#6  by: <3333   
#6    

hey! im so sorry that this happened to you. im planning on applying to w&l, so there any sororities that you recommend joining? thanks so much.

By: <3333
#7  by: Sorry to hear this, But   
#7    

I understand how you feel, however, you made one serious mistake......You went Greek!!!! Greek life overall is nothing more than a glorified high school club full of the same stereotype kids that you couldn't stand back in HS and still want to re-live their HS years in college. These are kids that just don't grow up. What you should have done is to join a professional or service club (some use greek names) where they serve a purpose on campus and treat you like a young adult instead of an elitist, drunken, crazy, or weird frat guy.

By: Sorry to hear this, But
by: UmmJul 9, 2022 9:20:30 PM

I'm willing to bet that you color/bleach/dye your hair.

By: Umm
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by: Trident Jul 19, 2022 5:34:58 PM

Join a service or professional frat at w&l?… where?

By: Trident
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