why did i get cut by every house that i loved?
by: ConfusedI went to Recruitment week this week with an open mind, an open heart, and a friendly attitude. I have good social skills, so conversing with the actives was easy and fun. Many times I talked to an active and I already felt like a sister, it was that comfortable and easy. The topics we conversed about were interesting, and they seemed genuinely interested in me. However, when Round 2 came around, all 8 or 9 of the houses that I loved cut me. In fact, I only had 4 parties on my round 2 list. Still, I went, and fell in love with a couple that I didn't realize would be good for me from Round 1. However, now I only have one party tonight for round 3 (I don't know which chapter yet). I don't know what is wrong with me, or why the sororities didn't like me enough to keep me through the rounds. Please help because I'm feeling pretty down about myself because of this.
#1 by: It only takes one
I felt the same way as you. I was so hurt by getting released from other places that it was hard for me to really give a fair shake to the houses that did invite me back. At many houses, they are looking for things like "whose little would she be?" and often you'll be very much liked by the houses that could not invite you back, but they thought you'd fit in better at a different chapter. ("she's just like my friend Suzie in chapter XYZ.")
It's also hard if you are new at college and trying to figure out who you are and the rejection hits. Why am I not good enough? Don't think of it that way! If even one house invited you back, remember, it only takes one! You only get one bid in the end!
Comment#2 by: Chin up
There is nothing wrong with you! With more PMMs than ever going through recruitment competition is fierce. Be your incredible self tonight when you go to the party. The house that invited you back obviously loves you and can see you as a sister. Embrace their love tonight. Good luck to you and remember, it only takes one!
#3 by: It only takes one
One more thing: chapter sisters are TRAINED to make every PNM feel wanted and loved, to compliment her on something, to be very warm. They want everyone to feel welcome and to want to belong! That's part of why it feels like a total shock when they release you. I was in love with some "top tier" places (I hate the tier stuff but you know what I mean) and when they cut me it hurt my pride, because they seemed like what I wanted to be! But then I stuck with my much smaller party list and found a place where I didn't need to change to fit right in. (and frankly I think my house now is a great place to blossom!)
Being released heavily sucks, though. It's easy for me to say "stick with it!" Now but I remember how miserable I felt. You're not alone!
#4 by: Last year PNM
I had only one house for Round 3 and Prefs last year and was extended a bid. Went to Bid Day but chose not to stay. I did not feel that it was for me. However, that being said, I trusted the process and completed it. Although I am not a Pan member I have found a great life at UF in many other ways! Stay positive!
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