In a word, yes. In three words, yes and no. Pretending that sorority rush isn’t a superficial process is a useless pursuit. It is incredibly easy to get a read on someone’s appearance in a two minute conversation, and very difficult to get a read on someone’s personality in the same time frame.
However, superficiality doesn’t mean that if you’re not a 10 you can’t have a great sorority experience. Bear in mind that there are some sororities that pretty much only recruit models. There are some that seemingly ignore appearance. But for the most part, sororities treat appearance like most other parts of society: it certainly helps, but it’s not a deal breaker.
How people look and present themselves is an indicator of their personality. Beautiful girls often share experiences with other beautiful girls—you may notice that most friend groups are similar in attractiveness. Sorority girls want to populate their sororities with people they feel are similar to them. If you are not similar in attractiveness to the sorority you hope to rush, you are at a disadvantage.
Furthermore, there is a (perhaps false) perception that pretty people are more confident, social, and fun. Most girls would say they do not care about how attractive their best friend is, but value these other traits. Sororities benefit from improving their social presence, and getting hot girls will often ensure their popularity on campus.
So, are you hopeless if you are not drop-dead gorgeous?
NO!
Unless you are rushing at Florida or Arizona State, sorority girls come in all forms—tall, short, thick, thin, pretty, and not-so-pretty. Being pretty is a helpful indicator that you are fun and have social capital, but not the only consideration. If you are absolutely personable, share things in common with the girls in the sorority, and would be an asset, there should be no reason not to take you.
On that note, do try to look your best. If you’re overweight, try to get in shape before rush. If you can improve yourself with hair, makeup, clothes, you might as well do it.
However, if you think you aren’t “good enough” in any aspect for a group of girls, you either 1) are wrong and will come off insecure, or 2) are right, and don’t want to be a part of that group anyways.
You can’t change your looks. Look your best, but more importantly be the best version of yourself.
